Day 18 Two for the Price of One

When to beings are in love and you confine one; it is like a two for one deal.  You are both effectively  imprisoned.  The only difference is one is sequestered inside the man made world where all is gray.  The other is tethered to it.  The cord is a long one and invisible at that, but it may as well be a unbreakable chain shackled to your leg because you can't really get away from it.  You live to take 10 minute calls from a federal prison.  You wait by the phone canceling appointments and luncheons afraid you'll miss the call.  When it arrives your conversation is timed and likely recorded and every so many seconds a mechanical voice jumps in to remind you, "this call is from an inmate at a federal penitentiary," and your not sure if they heard what you said because the recording was squawking away and now you have to repeat yourself and time is ticking like crazy and they sound upset and you ask what happened and they say there is no time to tell you but that they wrote you about it and then the little beeps come that signal the call is over and you are left alone in your kitchen holding a dead line.

He tells me often he is living in a gray world.  I paint.  You get gray when you mix black and white.  Some people think everything is black or white. Right and Wrong. Good and Bad. The reality is nature is a plethora of color.  Pick up a pine cone and really look at it.  You may have thought it was just all generic brown.  Well look closer.  I can find 2 dozen shades on a pine cone. Black and white are not even colors - gray is an abomination of the two - flat - dead. I use black and white when I want to lighten or darken colors on my palette.  I use black and white when I want to make a statement.  The stark contrast of the two.  People are not all black and white, but judgments are.  They can take the color and drain it out of us. They can make us gray.

I tell myself to stay in the moment.  I cannot change what has already happened in the past.  I am not a magician either so my influence on altering his time in the gray world is nil.  Resistance is futile. I can only pray that the system won't send me back someone I don't know anymore.  That my kind, easy going guy with the sparkle in his eye will reappear intact - his debt to society paid in full.